RAW

Raw. That is how I explain it. Have you ever had a really bad burn and it was just red, oozy, exposed, raw and hurt like you have never felt pain before? That is what I am feeling lately. I am feeling raw. I write my feelings, I talk about my feelings - more so than ever before. I let people into my life this way. I open up to friends about my life, my job, my relationships.

I wonder where this came from. I used to always be pretty shy, to myself and had a wall up between me and the rest of the world. These days, I feel like I am willing to share with anyone I can trust.

Is this good? I think so. I think for me to get feelings out and heal, I need to take the bandage off, let the burn ooze, hurt and slowly heal. Yes, it will be messy, it will cause great pain if it is touched, but that is part of the healing. I could put on a numbing ointment, but when the ointment wears off, the pain is back - it doesn't ease the process of healing.

Time is what helps the healing. Nurturing helps the healing. Taking care of myself helps the healing. This is what I need to do right now. Nurture myself. Realize that the pain will subside in time. Look forward to when the burn is gone and I don't hurt anymore. But, from here on, I just need to be careful not to touch the fire!